Thursday, December 9, 2010

Sit with me

Posted by Komal RK at 12:33 AM
Their incessant chatter and laughter made the clamorous platform a lot more noisy. Passers-by rightly guessed they were students. Young 16 year olds, off for a college vacation..yes..there was no doubt about that given the enthusiasm and excitement their laughter and merry talk was exuding.

It wasn’t infectious though. She wished it was. Standing a little away from the group, she looked at them with a feeling she couldn’t quite describe…these were her college mates, familiar faces, yet….
yet none was her friend. She admitted it. This was clearly a mistake. She regretted her decision. How could she be a part of it when she clearly wasn’t one of them? She tried in vain to find that initial eagerness she had.

She tried to tell herself she would make new friends. *sigh* No.

No she wouldn’t. She never could. She was the life and soul of a party, she was the centre of all things fun with her friends. But…she was bad at making new friends. Shy. Silly. True. She was but 16. Still. She told herself she’d enjoy the place. I doubt it said a voice inside her. She needed company. Her friends had bailed out. Alone. She looked at them again. Apparently she was invisible.*sigh* They were clicking pictures, their vacation had begun. Fun.

She felt alien. The other girl was voicing her exact thoughts. Prattling away about how she regrets not staying back. Shut up already! Damage done. Now she wistfully thought of the her friends, the cute guy she had a crush on forever, they had planned for the holidays together, they still would carry on with it. Without her. She was off on a vacation. With strangers. She wanted to cry.

There’s the signal. They get in. Too late.. too late…she thought. Bade goodbye to her parents, completely ignorant of the uneasiness she was feeling. Smile. For them. Wave. A little more enthusiastically. Turn. Pretence not needed now. Her shoulders drop. *sigh*. She walks along the long corridor to get to her compartment. Empty, save the ranting girl. *sigh* She sits next to the window. Great start she thought bitterly. The others have all disregarded the instructions given and were all assembled in one compartment, having a ball.

Lonely. No… it will be good. It won’t.

It was all crashing down. Every effort to look cheerful. This was a vacation! She should be thrilled. Then why was she so upset? She felt like now she could cry… or was she already? No. No she wouldn’t. Distraction. She looked outside the window. Stare out at the passing fields. Kids waving. Yes. Distraction. She shouldn’t be miserable. No she wasn’t. This was a vacation. Smile. Smile. Be happy. She wasn’t! Why wasn’t she? She couldn’t. Upset. Forlorn. She hated that very instant the fact that she was incredibly shy. She didn’t want to be. She didn’t have to be. But she was. Silly. Making new friends was daunting? No. Still. Getting past a few minutes seemed laborious! She had the entire week ahead. Depressing. She wished she was not on this train. She could now hear them sing. Stupid. Stupid me, she thought to herself for the millionth time that evening. She closed her eyes. Feeling the wind on her face as the train picked up speed, chugging along noisily. The sounds unsuccessful in drowning the singing. She tried to also block out the rants of the other girl now painfully describing what might’ve been. A smack on the face with her heavy bag would shut her up, she thought. She smiled at that picture. She sighed. She heard someone rush past her compartment giggling. She returned to concentrating on the rhythm of the train. Giggling. Block it out. It was getting closer, they would pass by again. Eyes still closed. Concentrate. Calm. Why aren’t they giggling their way back?

‘Hey!’ ..she opened her eyes. A curly haired girl from the group had stopped right in the middle of the compartment, smiling. A subdued hi was all she got in reply. ‘Why are you sitting here all alone?’. She too seemed to ignore the irritating girl who thankfully was quiet now. “Well I don’t really know anyone that well’’. Apparently it was amusing. The bubbly excited girl without a moments hesitation smiled the warmest smile ever. “Arre..that’s no problem yaar..come sit with me!!!”

:)

4 comments:

Appu said...

Awwww nice one, small friendly gestures when most needed are the best :)

Komal on December 18, 2010 at 4:03 AM said...

They surely are. And you never know what they lead to, one small incident can bring into your life the most special people ever :)

Shruti said...

awwwwwwwwwwwwwww....................... i posted the comment on FB... so posting it here this time,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I louuuuuuuuuuuuuu you :* :) :)

Komal RK on August 27, 2011 at 6:46 AM said...

And I love you :*

 

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